one of the more valuable things I’ve learned in life as a survivor of a mentally unstable parent is that it is likely that no one has thought through it as much as you have.
no, your friend probably has not noticed they cut you off four times in this conversation.
no, your brother didn’t realize his music was that loud while you were studying.
no, your bff or S.O. doesn’t remember that you’re on a tight deadline right now.
no, no one else is paying attention to the four power dynamics at play in your friend group right now.
a habit of abused kids, especially kids with unstable parents, is the tendency to notice every little detail. We magnify small nuances into major things, largely because small nuances quickly became breaking points for parents. Managing moods, reading the room, perceiving danger in the order of words, the shift of body weight….it’s all a natural outgrowth of trying to manage unstable parents from a young age.
Here’s the thing: most people don’t do that. I’m not saying everyone else is oblivious, I’m saying the over analysis of minor nuances is a habit of abuse.
I have a rule: I do not respond to subtext. This includes guilt tripping, silent treatments, passive aggressive behavior, etc. I see it. I notice it. I even sometimes have to analyze it and take a deep breath and CHOOSE not to respond. Because whether it’s really there or just me over-reading things that actually don’t mean anything, the habit of lending credence to the part of me that sees danger in the wrong shift of body weight…that’s toxic for me. And dangerous to my relationships.
The best thing I ever did for myself and my relationships was insist upon frank communication and a categorical denial of subtext. For some people this is a moral stance. For survivors of mentally unstable parents this is a requirement of recovery.
“Why do you beat yourself up so much over little mistakes?”
This is such a good illustration of emotional abuse
Just a reblog to spread the most UN noticed abuse, be aware
and reminder for everyone to be patient with your loved ones who apologize constantly, or have a really emotional reaction to something that seems insignificant to you.
tonights bdsm safe word is “superwholock” because thats the best moodkiller i can think of
i made this post two days ago late at night when i was tired as shit and ive gotten at least 10 death threats, 13 messages threatening to dox me, and 5 telling me that im “a piece of shit user who needs to stick a dragon dildo up their ass while shoving a cock down my throat” and i still love this post
God damn. For that one word?
What’s the big deal about that word? It sounds like a made up one
It is. From different shows. I’m assuming doctor who and Sherlock. The “super” part I’m not sure about
Times are changing.
The rush of adrenaline I got from realizing kids these days don’t know about superwholock was like I had just slayed the nine-headed Lernaean Hydra.
got tired of all these exclusive memes so i made one just for straight people uwu
i’m not even straight and this kind of pisses me off? you all make fun of straights but as soon as someone makes fun of gays they’re the spawn of satan. your double standards are annoying as hell y’all
This is an awful meme. Its Its not even a meme. Its just bad
Not all straight people are homophobic and transfobic, a large part of them are our allies and we must love and educate our allies who only want our well-being and fight together with us.
toxic people like you in the lgbt community is the main reason why I do not feel part of it smh
Jesus Christ. How the hell are we supposed to keep allies if all we do is fucking shit on them? Also, straight people can be trans lmao.
There ya go
Also yeah, nice job forgetting straight trans people OP
The LGBT community: *has fought for years to get cishet people to understand them and help them fight against oppression*
some dumb ass: Straight people suck lol owo cissies are disgusting why would anyone want to be cis? If your cishet go piss yourself uwu.
the studious reader: reads in coffe shops and at the library, drinks lots of lattes, takes the best pictures, lives for the aesthetic, blankets and cozy outfits and candles are a priority no matter the place and time of year or day, probably a literature student or in a social sciences field, tabs, comes up with the weirdest and most detailed theories
the chaotic reader: reads four books at once, regularly forgets characters’ names, crazy reading habits, reads mostly late at night or for unhealthy stretches of time, eats snacks or bites nails while reading, had an intense reading phase around the year 2014 and feels very nostalgic about that, passionate and outspoken
the summer reader: reads outside, wears sunglasses and sits directly on the ground to read, plays with sand or grass while reading, gets bored if the story is stalling or running in circles but otherwise gets easily lost in a book, likes a sweet drink or a nice cup of tea, unapologetically reads bad chick lits, plot over prose, tropes are friends
the addicted reader: reads on the bus in bed on a chair in class at work in the bath whilst walking, would read in their sleep, wears headphones to impede social interactions, owns the largest and most eclectic collection of books, refuses to think about the library of alexandria, picky and generally hard to please, likes to keep their favorite copies freakishly clean
I’m lowkey all of these
C h a o t ic b i n ch
I am still the addicted reader that I was in both elementary and middle school. *continues to sneakily read in class*
Anxiety-prone-human 