idkhowbutyoufoundme:

rotten-to-the-applecore:

pwapboi:

awful-ninja:

pwapboi:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

seb-vit:

everything-is-better-with-a-ph:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

nite nite lil fuckers. 

me as a parent

they shouldn’t trust you with children

They already don’t

technically you signed over your firstborn when you followed me 

great, now I owe my firstborn to FOUR people

Cut in forths or is it a custody battle?

Custody I guess. I promised it to several people 

Me, from my desk, lowering my glasses to glare at you: Did you bring enough firstborn for the whole class?

Mom says it’s my turn with the firstborn

But mom said I COULD have it!