(New Donk City)
Ridley cackled from his perch atop the building as the motley crew who had assembled to hunt him gathered bellow. Led by Peach (Peach of all people!) Yoshi, Daisy, and Donkey Kong had tracked Ridley down, intending to pay him back for the harm he had done to Mario.
“Well, well, well. What have we here?” sneered Ridley as he grimaced down at them. “A band of misfits, here to give me a proper thrashing?” he snarled.
“Coward!” cried Daisy, brandishing her golf club. “Get down here and fight like a man… woman… dinosaur… alien… thing!” she cried.
Rolling his eyes, Ridley laughed. “Oh my! All so upset about what I did to your precious champion?” he growled. “Give me a break. This is as stupid as it is pointless!” he cried.
“What’s wrong?! Scared!?” growled DK. “Mario beat up stupid lizard if he had fought like man!” called the Ape, readying to punch Ridley sky high.
Ridley scoffed. “Puh-lease. You’re making me want to vomit. And that’s quite the feat! Considering that I don’t have a gag reflex.” he scoffed. Then an ugly leer came over him. “But hey! Maybe you can give me a real fight. After all, your precious champion went down like a sack of bricks.” he cackled. “Oh yeah. He didn’t stand a chance. Little soft weakling that he is. So much for the pride of the-”
“Here we..”
Ridley glanced down, only to see a fiery green comet blasting up from the ground. Too fast for him to block or dodge.
“GOOOOOOOO!” The comet socked Ridley in the maw, knocking him away and sprawling on the roof. The Space Pirate goraned and looked up to see Luigi, cracking his knuckles, surrounded by an aura of green fire.
“You hurt my brother.” said the green-cap plumber. “Now I hurt you.”
———————————————————
On the roof of a neighboring building, Wolf O’Donnell watched the situation with relative amusement as Luigi built the ever living snot out of Ridley. There was a ring on his scouter and he answered it.
“You’ve got Wolf.” he said.
“Ah, yes.” said Ganondorf on the other end. “How goes the situation in New Donk City?” he asked in his smooth voice.
“Well, Luigi is currently handing Barney the Roid-Rage Dinosaur his generous purple ass.” answered Wolf.
Ganondorf snorted in amusement. “Excellent. I intended to humble Ridley myself, but it seems Luigi is doing a fine job for me.” said the Demon King. “He sould be a much more agreeable pawn now.” he said.
“And by humble you mean beat the piss out of him right?” asked Wolf.
“Precisely.” said Ganondorf.
“Spines don’t bend that way. Spines don’t bend that way!” cried Ridley
SNAP!
“AGGGH! NOT THAT WAY EITHER!”
“Yeah… you may have to pull a Dr. Frankenstein and sew him back together.” said Wolf.
“Meh. It wouldn’t be my first time.” said Ganondorf, who promptly hung up.
Wolf rolled his eyes. “Freaking weirdos.”
———————————————————————————————————–
Ridley groaned, his many injuries smarting, but started in fear when Luigi walked up to him. “We’re not done yet.” growled Mario’s younger brother.
With that, Luigi grabbed Ridley by the tail and began to spin him around and around. “See you in-a Hell!” cried Luigi, before launching Ridley far into the distance.
HELL YES IM ALWAYS UP FOR A FUCKING PISSED OFF PROTECTIVE LUIGI!
Anxiety-prone-human 